http://www.gogomortgageloan.com/private-mortgages.html My private mortgages scheme may be finished, but I'll get you next time, Gadget! Next time!!!!!! en-us Sat, 26 Jul 2008 15:00:00 EDT Sat, 26 Jul 2008 15:00:00 EDT Weblog Editor 2.0 Don't worry about the detective, Mad Cat, there is no way this bumbling fool will see through our next scheme for expensive, unfavorable private mortgages, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! We've been ruined so many times in the past by our nemesis, I'm beginning to think that dog of his knows a little more about mortgages than it's letting on to. All my past plans for private mortgages mayhem - ruined! First there was the non-disclosure of a prepayment penalty, in which I effectively transformed private mortgages into a financial prison no man could escape! With a high prepayment penalty no refinancing opportunity would be great enough to offset the costs, and lowly homeowners we stuck with my loan and whatever rates I gave them! Private mortgages are never more lucrative than when people don't know all the details, and this Inspector had to come in and teach everyone to ask about prepayment penalties - curses! Then there was my ingenious scheme for making money off private mortgages without breaking a sweat - telling people how to "save" by joining with my bi-weekly repayment plan, har har har! It works, paying half your monthly mortgage requirements every two weeks will give you an extra month's worth of repayment every year, cutting time, interest and money off of your overall mortgage term, but people were actually paying me tons off money to tell them how to do it! Genius! But my scheme all came crumbling when that Inspector told everyone they can make these payments on their private mortgages completely on their own! Foibled! Finally it was my devious and virtually flawless scheme for second mortgages! 125% equity financing is something everyone could want - and when they failed to come up with a easy repayment and they couldn't deduct the excess percentage they found themselves in a world of financial danger - with no one there to stop them! Until that fool came along and showed everyone just how unnecessary 125% financing really is - blast that infernal Inspector! I even had 35 year olds applying for reverse mortgages - ha ha! And my plan would have worked! I'll get you next time Beware Inspector, Dr. Claw and al my sinister minions are devision new and well-cloaked means to make a quick buck off private mortgages. We include hidden fees in each application for private mortgages, fees the home owner never sees! We tell people shopping for the best private mortgages and opportunities that each credit check will lower their score when in fact they have a two-week period in which any all all credit checks will have zero impact on their score! Interest only plans with undetectable clauses, reverse mortgages to prey on the weak and retired, private mortgages for people with such impossibly heinous credit there is no way they can expect to meet their mortgage requirements - we're always working! You can try your best to uncover all our evil mortgage secrets, but we are unstoppable! Sat, 26 Jul 2008 15:00:00 EDT